"Bad Hair Day"

When I was in college and feeling sad, lonely, frustrated, or any other negative emotion, I'd call my mom.  She got many of these phone calls my Freshman year and quickly deemed them "bad hair days". Many many years later, we still call our low days, "bad hair days". Today is a bad hair day for me.  I was notified yesterday of the passing of a young friend of mine.  She was a wonderful person and so very sweet. It saddens me that she has left this world for a better one and yet I am happy for her that she is in a better world.
Hearing of her passing has triggered many emotions beyond the sadness of her departure. She, like I, was a single woman who carried extra weight and was hopeful of finding a life companion. I'm sad that she didn't find that person while here on Earth and I as reflect on that, it creates some angst about my own situation. I worry that my weight could cause serious mental and physical heath issues that may keep me from living to a very old age. My weight already keeps me from living the active life I desire, I don't want it to keep me from living all together. These are feelings that I have reflected on constantly since hearing of my dear friend.
This week in general has not been such a great week in my journey. I have continued to exercise daily, eat properly and get as much sleep as possible. I also feel like I'm not doing enough, yet when faced with the challenge of doing more, I really don't want to. Like I said, it's a "bad hair day". I just have to muddle through and pray that it gets better. I'm so glad that I have people around me that love me and support me on this journey. It's "bad hair days", like this, that I lean on them for their support.
I want to throw in the towel but because the world knows what I weigh, it makes it that much harder to stop the progress.
Thank you for your love and support.